Thursday, February 11, 2010

Kindness, Loneliness and "Haters" in society

You will notice that I have added a link to a URL. This is a blog that I follow. I found Kandee on YouTube. Today I watched her video entitled "This is NOT a video about makeup". It really touched me. She makes a point about people, you can ask people to say 10 negative things about someone and they have no problem doing that, but ask them to say 10 nice things about that same person and they will have trouble.

We have so many stresses in our lives simply with getting everything done we need to in the time available. Now, we who are trying to live our life to our best, have to deal with people commonly know as "haters". We all can think of other adjectives to call these people. But they take more from us then they are due. They take our time and they take our confidence, they take our happiness and even if it is for a short time it is time they are not due. How do to deal with these viruses, no clue, really no clue. With the Internet we cant hide. They post to YouTube, they send emails, etc..
No matter what we say to ourselves to work through the mud they throw at those who are being productive in society we still have to clean off that mud.

The only thing we can do is to make a vow never to join in that behavior. That also means that if we know of someone who is a "hater" and is spewing their vomit on others put an end to it. If that person if your friend reconsider quickly if you want to keep them as a friend. Someday you will irritate them and they will throw their trash your way.

These "haters" cause damage, sometimes irretrievable damage, even death. They must not be allowed to remain in your world.

Empathy, that is what we must have. Empathy for the people who are innocent of everything except that this person thinks they are better and more important then everyone else and especially the one they are tormenting. If we don't say or do anything to stop these people we are guilty of complicity. We can not control the behavior of others, but we can make it know that their behavior is sick and something we want nothing to with. Yes, their venom can turn on you and it will take strength and integrity but you are helping in keeping this contagion limited.

The best case scenario is that the good people leave these "haters" to each other and then they can turn on each other.

The most ironic portion of this is" haters" think everyone hates them because they think they are so wonderful, but in reality we don't hate the "haters" we hate their behavior. On YouTube the "haters" we identified and it was suggested to give them negative comments. You might feel that is the only recourse you have but that is what they expect and you know the comment that they will be making. These people don't like themselves anyway so adding fuel to that fire means they will only keep up. Fire needs oxygen and we cant give them any oxygen. What is the worst thing for a "hater"? Being ignored, isolated, the same thing they are trying to do to others. They like the audience. We all have much more important things to do like helping up someone "hit" by the trash of a "hater". Don't focus on the hater focus on the victim of the venom.

Kindness is what we need, kindness to ourselves, you are not stupid, fat or unlovable. You would never say that to anyone so why say it to yourself. The fact that you know you would never say it to another person shows that you are a kind, caring person and are currently in a situation that you don't feel supported. All things change.

We may be physically lonely in our fast pace world and "talking" to a computer isn't the same, but we do have that ability to reach out to people and be kind to them through our technology.

Be kind to all. You find a "hater" just turn and walk the other way they should have no portion of your time and life.

This sounds simple, and when being harassed by "haters" this post really does sound simple. You may understand that your not alone and that everyone is not against you, but the unparalleled weight in your heart wont go away. Support those in this situation, take action - legal, what ever it takes. Your life is to valuable to continue in this. Reach out for help, it will be there. Just ask.

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