My new favorite word

Sprezzatura


"The rehearsed spontaneity, studied carelessness, and well-practiced naturalness that underlies persuasive discourse"

Etymology:
Coined by Baldassare Castiglione in The Book of the Courtier (1528): "[T]o avoid affectation in every way possible . . . and (to pronounce a new word perhaps) to practice in all things a certain Sprezzatura [nonchalance], so as to conceal all art and make whatever is done or said appear to be without effort and almost without any thought about it."

From: http://grammar.about.com/od/rs/g/sprezzatura.htm

Not synonyms but they are see also - glamor and style

Great word - if you look around the internet there are quiet a few different takes on this word and how you can apply it into your life. Some pages, to be honest had me contemplating a wish that I could push the one writing the page from a high window in my building or at least from my head, because of how hard and studied you needed to be to achieve true and great sprezzatura.

That is why I write Elegance: Redefined, Elegance isn't heavy, you shouldn't feel that you'll never achieve it. It is a work in progress,fun work in progress. Remember those diets we all tried; no this, no that, no this, no that. After a week all you could do was think of the horrific things you could inflict on the writer of the book.

I think the greatest point of the definition is: "To Avoid Affectation in every way possible..."

Great another look at dictionary.com

Affectation: "an effort to appear to have a quality not really or fully possessed; the pretense of actual possession:"

So we have "fake it till you make it" vs. "never let them see you sweat".

When you start on the road to elegance there are times you'll be acting in an affectatious way, but as you go it will become your nature, Sprezzatura.